#63 A rough few weeks

    A few days ago, I was at my friend’s house.   We were all sitting around watching the Indians game, when some of his other friends rushed into the room wearing full paintball gear yelling and pretending to be a SWAT team.   They were shouting at us all to get on the ground and shut up.   One came up to me and put the paintball gun to my chest and ordered me to get on the ground.   We were startled at first, but soon recognized the voices and realized who were behind the masks.   They soon gave up the hoax and we all started laughing, when I hear a pffft and an “oops”.   I felt like my chest was on fire and sure enough, when I looked down I saw orange paint all over my shirt.
    A few weeks ago, my friends and went to see Fast Five.   Afterwards, we all went back to one of my friend’s dorm.   Within the first ten minutes of getting back, something happened that I will not forget any time soon.   One of the kids from his floor, who was no doubt drunk, slowly walked into his room.   The door was wide open, as it usually is, but no one in the room has even talked to this kid before.   I thought it was a little strange seeing him walk in, so I was curious to see what he was up to.   This kid walked straight up to my friend’s futon and started reaching for his waistband.   He was about to pee all over the futon!!!   I quickly started screaming at him, “NO NO NO NO!!! Not right there!!”   Luckily, I did react before my friend’s futon was turned into a urinal.

#62 Lockouts!!!

    My biggest fear is the seemingly inevitable NFL lockout next year.   Just to catch everyone up on the latest labor agreement problems between the NFL owners and the players; they two parties can’t figure out how to divide up the nine billion dollar revenue that the NFL brings in each year.   They are in day seventy-something of trying to negotiate an agreement on the revenue split.   After those seventy days, they have gotten absolutely nowhere!   You might be thinking well that’s fine since NFL players make millions of dollars a year, and while that is true for the big name players, they aren’t the only ones that need to get paid.   If there is no NFL next year, everyone that works for the stadium will be out of a job, the travel agencies that are responsible for transporting players will lose a lot of business, the businesses that thrive on the crowd that NFL games bring in could be forced to close, agents of players will not make any money, and millions of fans will be heartbroken that there is no more football on sundays or mondays.   The money also could go to players’s retirement fund, to practice squad players, coaches and other people that work for the teams.
    What could make the situation even worse would be a lockout in the NBA next season as well.   The NBA could be headed towards a situation similar to what the NFL is dealing with now.   If there is no NFL or NBA next year, I might go into a severe depression.

#59 The Milkshake Incident

    My biggest regret ever is bringing my milkshake.  It brought all of these boys over to my yard, and they started arguing saying mine was better than theirs.  So I told them, “damn right, it’s better than yours.”  Eventually I taught them, but they of course had to pay.
    My second biggest mistake was buying rufilin from a guy named Doug. He told me that it was ecstasy, but I found out later it was rufilin. It was at a friend’s bachelor party in Vegas. Me and three of my friends were on the roof of our hotel and I slipped what I thought was ecstasy into our drinks. We all ended up blacking out and could not remember what we did that night. The next morning, my friend Doug was missing! The other three of us spent the next day looking for him trying to get him to his wedding that day. I used my deductive reasoning skills and my awesome fanny-pack to figure out where we left Doug the night before.
    Some other things that happened that night: some naked asian man ended up in my dad’s trunk and hit me with a crowbar, we stole a police car, we stole fifty thousand dollars, we stole Mike Tyson’s pet tiger, we lost the fifty thousand dollars we stole, I used my superior intelligence to win fifty thousand dollars in blackjack. Long story short, the biggest mistake of my life turned out to be the best night of my life.

#56 The Giant

    I have a few best friends: Adam, Beau and Austin.   I have known Adam the longest and probably know him the best.   Adam and I have always gotten along and have been best friends for a few years now.   We were planning on being roommates our freshman year, but we had a crazy college decision to make.   Originally, both of us were rejected from The Ohio State University, and were accepted very late.   Once we both got rejected, we planned on going to the University of Toledo and rooming together.   OSU sent me my acceptance letter on May 5th last year, and Adam received his a few days before I did.   After our acceptances, we were planning on being roommates here.   However, Adam received a scholarship to Toledo that paid for nearly all of his college expenses, so he decided to attend Toledo.   I was upset that we weren’t going to be roommates, but I don’t blame him for wanting to go to college for free.
    Adam is one of the tallest people that I have ever met.   At 6’10’’,  he is one of the few people that make me feel short when I’m around them.   It’s actually nice being around him, because I feel like I’m a normal height.   Adam and I don’t have any of same favorite teams, but we both dislike the same teams (Spurs, Cowboys, Michigan, all SEC teams, etc.).   We have been on a few trips together too.   We have driven to my aunt’s cottage, New Smyrna Beach, Florida and cedar point a handful of times.   We have also been to two Cavs games, a Browns game and Toledo’s bowl game last season.

#55 New Smyrna Beach

    My favorite place in the world is New Smyrna Beach, Florida.   I went there for spring break my sophomore year.   My friend was going there to visit his grandma for the first time at her house in New Smyrna Beach and he invited me to come with him.
    We went with his parents and we took turns driving straight through to Florida.   It was one of the longest drives of my life, but it was definitely worth it.   The drive felt like it took years, but we did pass through a few interesting places.   Atlanta was amazing at night with all of the buildings lit up it was one of the most beautiful sights I’ve ever seen.
    When we finally did get to my friend’s grandma’s house, I wanted nothing more than to go to the beach.   After over a day in a car, I could not wait to get out and do something.   This was very easy because she lives a block away from the beach.   She has a very nice house and it is very open so the breeze could flow through every room.   Every day we went to the beach and played catch or laid out until the sun went down.   After the sun went down, we played basketball as long as we could.
    I absolutely love Florida!   I love how warm it is, how relaxed it is, how fun it is and of course all of the beautiful women!   I had such a great time on that vacation, and it moved New Smyrna Beach up to the top of my favorite places list.

#54 Two Truths and a Lie

    Last year, my friends and I went to a Cleveland Cavaliers preseason game.   We were having a great time, until about fifteen guys coming from a bachelor party showed up late in the 2nd quarter.   They were the rudest, loudest, most obnoxious people I have ever been around in my life.   Near the end of the 3rd quarter, they called over the beer vendor.   One of the drunk guys ended up knocking over the vendor and spilling beer all over my friend.   We called the arena management and the drunken party was asked to leave.   Because of the fiasco, we ended up getting four free tickets to the Cavs’ 2nd home game that season against the Bobcats.   That game was without drunken idiots surrounding us, and the Cavs won the game.
    A few days ago, I was at my friend’s house.   We were all sitting around watching the Indians game, when some of his other friends rushed into the room wearing full paintball gear yelling and pretending to be a SWAT team.   They were shouting at us all to get on the ground and shut up.   One came up to me and put the paintball gun to my chest and ordered me to get on the ground.   We were startled at first, but soon recognized the voices and realized who were behind the masks.   They soon gave up the hoax and we all started laughing, when I hear a pffft and an “oops”.   I felt like my chest was on fire and sure enough, when I looked down I saw orange paint all over my shirt.
    A few weeks ago, my friends and went to see Fast Five.   Afterwards, we all went back to one of my friend’s dorm.   Within the first ten minutes of getting back, something happened that I will not forget any time soon.   One of the kids from his floor, who was no doubt drunk, slowly walked into his room.   The door was wide open, as it usually is, but no one in the room has even talked to this kid before.   I thought it was a little strange seeing him walk in, so I was curious to see what he was up to.   This kid walked straight up to my friend’s futon and started reaching for his waistband.   He was about to pee all over the futon!!!   I quickly started screaming at him, “NO NO NO NO!!! Not right there!!”   Luckily, I did react before my friend’s futon was turned into a urinal.

#51 Space Exploration

    My major is space exploration.   Not really, but it sounds better than undecided.   Since OSU calls that exploration, I just tell everyone that I’m in space exploration.   It is a great conversation starter and it makes me sound smart.   If I say that I am undecided, people just assume that I’m not trying to find a major.   That is completely untrue.   I have been trying to figure out what I want to do for the past couple of years, with no real luck.   Some classes that I have taken have helped me figure out what I like and what I don’t like, but I’m still not sure what I would do with those majors.   I have found the psychology and communication classes that I have taken in high school and college very interesting.   I think people are really interesting and I think it would be fun learning about people.   However, I haven’t looked into a communication career yet, and if I take the psychology path, I would need to get a phd in psychology.   That doesn’t sound as fun.   If I could pick a career without worrying about money, I would choose to either be a coach or a personal trainer.   I love sports and being around a team would be really exciting, I would also like to be a personal trainer.   That way I could help people, as well as do something that I love doing.   The most important thing I am looking for in a career is the atmosphere.   I want to do something that I love.

#50 The most interesting man in the world

    There are many people that I would love to meet.   Peyton Hillis would have to be at the top of the list.   I would love to spend a day with the Madden’s newest cover-man.   It would be really nice to see what he does every day and to see his work ethic.   There is a reason he is the first white running back to rush for over a thousand yards in 25 years!   His workouts must be insane and it would be great if I could try them and do them myself.   It would also be interesting to see what he does daily and what he thinks about.
    Will Ferrell would also be great to meet.   He is one of my favorite comedians and I think he is extremely interesting.   If I got to meet him, I might be able to go to a movie set and be surrounded by Will as well as other funny people.   Just imagining what goes through Will’s mind on a daily basis is crazy, I would love to know what does go on up there.
    Another person I would like to meet is Kevin Durant.   I am an Oklahoma City Thunder fan and Durant is one of my favorite players.   Meeting him and maybe going to a game or even a practice would be incredible!   There is so much I could learn from just spending a few hours with him.   Whether it is improving my shot, learning the game or just listening to what he has to say would be really cool.

#49 Coaching

    I can normally only remember one or two dreams every month.   Someone told me that intelligence level determines how well you remember dreams, so I’m hoping that they were just giving me a hard time.   Since I can’t remember any of my dreams and don’t have any reoccurring dreams, I will talk about a dream of mine as a goal.   One day I hope to be either a position or an assistant coach for a college or professional team.   I would like to be a coach of basketball or football.
    I am a huge football fan so being a coach would be one of the greatest jobs in the world.   I would be the happiest man in the world if I was a football coach.   I could watch football all day every day.   Being surrounded by people that know football and talk football all the time would be amazing and would be a great learning experience.   There are so many aspects of football to study and to analyze and everyone has their own unique view.   Having so many people with so many different views would mean that it is impossible to learn everything so it wouldn’t get boring.   Being a coach, I would be able to go to every game and practice.   I would get to see most stadiums around the country.
    Being a basketball coach would offer similar benefits to being a coach of football.   I would get to see plenty of different venues, there would always be things to do and there would always be things to learn.   The biggest benefit would be being on or near a basketball court almost every day, giving me plenty of opportunities to play.

#48 Hibernation and Photosynthesis

    There are a few things in nature that I am fascinated by.   One of those things is hibernation.  I think it’s amazing that bears can sleep for 3 months every year.   It would be like going into a coma for 3 months every year.   If a person slept for 3 months everyone would freak out, but it is perfectly normal for bears.   If 10 hours of sleep can seem like a few moments for humans, I wonder if bears even realize that they have slept for 3 months.   When they wake up are they hungry, tired, angry, or exactly the same as they fell asleep?
    Another thing that I find very interesting is photosynthesis.   It is unbelievable to me that living organisms can live on sunlight.   Yes I do understand that photosynthesis is a very complicated process but for arguments sake I’m simplifying it.   Just imagine if people could live on sunlight and water.   Wouldn’t it be nice to just walk outside on a sunny day to replace eating for a few days.   You wouldn’t have to worry about eating all the time, and you could store that energy for later.   There could be a few problems with that though.   Would people be able to live through the winter?   Could people in climates with very little sunlight find other sources of food?   Would people that spend all day in the sun get fat because they are basically eating all day?   Would you be able to taste the sunlight?   If you could taste it, would it taste good or be awful?   Could there be different flavors of sunlight?   Tons of questions come to mind when thinking about this.

#45 Take A Little Trip...

    When I was 11, my whole family went on a cruise to the Bahamas.   It was our  first vacation since I was about 4.   I don’t know if any of you have ever been on a cruise before, but just in case you had any doubt, it is phenomenal!   First of all, you can’t even tell that you are on a ship.   The cruise ships are so big that they don’t rock very much.   That was my biggest concern was getting sea sick since I had never been out on the water for an extended period of time.   My favorite part of the cruise was having something to do at all times.   On the upper decks, there were shuffleboard courts, basketball courts, pools, a water slide and plenty of space to get some sun.   A few levels below, there were two all-you-can-eat buffets (that were not weight-watchers friendly).   The buffets had a pizza station, a sandwich station, an ice cream machine, a fruit bar, a salad bar and the longest buffet table I have ever seen.   I still have not eaten more in a five day span than I did on that cruise when I was 11.   Other features of the ship were the desolate exercise and weight rooms, a performance stage, a sit-down restaurant and a few bars.   That trip was the best vacation that I’ve ever been on and it was the one that meant a lot to me.

#43 Hello Bahamas!

    For a Christmas present in 2003, my whole family went on a cruise to the Bahamas.   It wasn’t a tangible present, but being my first vacation since I was about 4, that is what I consider my favorite present of all time.
    I don’t know if any of you have ever been on a cruise before, but just in case you had any doubt, it is phenomenal!   First of all, you can’t even tell that you are on a ship.   The cruise ships are so big that they don’t rock very much.   That was my biggest concern was getting sea sick since I had never been out on the water for an extended period of time.   My favorite part of the cruise was having something to do at all times.   On the upper decks, there were shuffleboard courts, basketball courts, pools, a water slide and plenty of space to get some sun.   A few levels below, there were two all-you-can-eat buffets (that were not weight-watchers friendly).   The buffets had a pizza station, a sandwich station, an ice cream machine, a fruit bar, a salad bar and the longest buffet table I have ever seen.   I still have not eaten more in a five day span than I did on that cruise when I was 11.   Other features of the ship were the desolate exercise and weight rooms, a performance stage, a sit-down restaurant and a few bars.
    That was the best vacation of my life, but I hope one day I can top it.

#42 Which blog did you order miss?

     I am currently employed at a banquet hall back home called Nazareth Hall.   I do not like my job at all!   My job is to do whatever needs to be done during an event.   Most of the events at Nazareth Hall are wedding receptions or Sunday brunches.   There are some reunions, dances, sorority and frat dinners, but there are very few of them.   The Hall has an indoor and outdoor chapel and four dining rooms.   Most people get married in one of the chapels and then have the reception there too.
    My job is not very challenging, but I am under an enormous amount of pressure most of the time.   I don’t like working receptions because I am basically responsible for making sure the best day of those being wed doesn’t turn into a disaster.   We serve 3 courses for every meal, and then we have to bus, organize and clean everything.   Everyone at the reception expects all the workers to be perfect, and my boss always preaches perfection.   What very few people realize is that most of the time when things go wrong, it is because the wedding party didn’t tell us about something.   An example of something that happens a lot is people informing us that they have more guests than they originally told us and we have to be able to accommodate them and prepare extra meals for them.
    The only reason I stay is because of the people that work there.   There are some really cool people that work there, and they make it worth dealing with all the angry guests.

#40 Vegas Baby!

    My older brother is one of the most interesting people in my life.   His name is Cayl, he is 25 and he is a police officer in Las Vegas.   4 years ago, he moved out to Vegas to attend one of the best police academies in the nation.   He had heard that Vegas was trying to expand their police force by a significant number and he was willing to risk everything and take his chances there.   Thankfully that risk has paid off for him.   As soon as he graduated from the academy, he was hired to police the Vegas strip.
    Cayl loves what he does, and perhaps even more importantly, he loves Vegas.   The way he describes life out there, I can’t say that I blame him.   They have really good weather; sure it’s hot, but it’s not humid.   Vegas is always busy, it’s exciting and it’s close to California and Arizona.   Last year, Cayl bought a house just outside of Las, Vegas.   He lives pretty close to the mountains and within driving distance of LA and Phoenix.   I think it’s cool that he has been to the last two BCS National Championship games.   Last year it was in Glendale, AZ at the University of Phoenix Stadium, and the year before it was at the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, CA.
    I am really proud of my brother and all that he has been able to do.   It took some serious cojones to take a chance on something 2,000 miles away, but it seems to be working out great and I couldn’t be any happier for him.

#39 The Most Difficult Grammar Rule

    I have found that the most difficult grammar rule is the use of a period.   It’s been a while since I learned this, but if I remember correctly, a sentence usually ends with some sort of punctuation; the most common being a period.    I know that was one of the first grammar rules that we learned, but I always seem to forget about it.   Just about all my text messages are completely void of periods, and as you can see, none of my blog titles have periods at the end of them.
    It seems like the older I get the fewer periods and punctuations I use.   It seems like I’m not the only one who struggles with this problem.   I know most people don’t use periods in text messages, in emails and in their blog titles.   Also, it seems that Hollywood hates periods too.   I can’t think of any movies titles that have periods in them.   Colons seem to be okay though, colons show up all the time in movie titles.   The same thing goes for book titles, newspaper articles and video games.   I think that because it is so simple, people think it is unnecessary and don’t feel the need to use one

#38 Liars and Tiger and Pornstars, Oh My!

    Every woman in the world wants YOU!   Your problem: you’re married!   Not so lucky anymore are you?   Imagine what that feels like.   You can have any woman that you want, and all that’s standing in your way is one woman.   A woman that you barely see because she is off in another country modeling or at a fashion show.   Maybe she’s off with another man, maybe she’s spending all of your money, she could even be spending your money on another man.   How could you know for sure?   How would she know if you cheated?   She is halfway across the globe, there’s no way she could catch you.
    Whoops!   She caught you and she’s telling the world.   Now everyone knows  and she’s leaving.   Going with her: your money, your pride, even your kids!   Your kids are going to grow up without a dad, ore maybe your kids will grow up calling someone else dad.   A few bad decisions and all of a sudden you have nothing.

#36

    6 years ago I was one of the premiere tight ends in the NFL.   I skipped Jr. High to go to the NFL.   At 13, was the youngest player to ever play in the league.   My first four seasons were the best for any tight end in NFL history.   I had everything I could ever ask for.   Women, money, cars, fame, you name it, it was mine.
    Just before the start of my fifth season, I had my arm broken in 5 places.   Doctors told me I had no chance of playing again that season.   I couldn’t believe it!   I wasn’t going to let an injury ruin my season.   As soon as my arm healed, I went through the most intense rehab any man has ever been through.   I tried to build up my strength as fast as I could, but my body just couldn’t handle everything I was putting it through.   Week 13 rolled around and I still wasn’t anywhere near where I needed to be to play.   My trainer noticed my frustration and suggested something to speed up my recovery.   He started to give me a recovery aid similar to HGH, an illegal substance in the NFL.   The substance made me fail an NFL drug test, and I was suspended 8 games.
    The Browns immediately cut me from the team, not wanting to have a suspended player on the roster.   I decided to go play football for The Ohio State University.   I’m trying to bring a National Championship to OSU and hopefully make it back to the NFL one day.
    I messed up.   For two weeks, I used a legal recovery aid that happened to be on the NFL’s banned substance list.   I have since been labeled by many as a liar, a cheater and a bad person.   I’m not a bad person, I just messed up.   I know I made a mistake and regret that decision every day of my life.

#35 Purpose

    The purpose of my CP article is to get people to look at celebrities and professional athletes in a different way.   I hope to make people realize the incredible amounts of pressure that are on celebrities.
    Just imagine being the best golfer in the entire world for 623 weeks.   Put yourself in Tiger’s shoes for a minute.   For all but one week in 2007, you have been the worlds number one golfer.   Everyone on the PGA tour wants to beat you, everyone else is dreaming of taking your crown.   Millions watching either expect you to win or are praying that you lose.   You have more money than you could spend in a lifetime.   Masses of women want you and will do anything to have sex with you.   Every reporter in the world would kill to interview you.   Every sports tv station, sports journal and sports magazine is going to analyze everything you say.   All news stations and tabloids are doing everything they can to catch you doing something wrong.   Would you be able to handle all that pressure?   Could you handle all that power?
    I’m not trying to rid Tiger of all responsibility because what he did was wrong.   I am, however, trying to show that he is human and makes mistakes.   I’m hoping that by taking time to see why he would do something like this, you could at least understand how something like this could happen.